I failed an exam pretty badly last year, so this year I changed it up a bit. I decided that I would ace every single exam by doing study groups with people. Teachers always recommend study groups, but they don’t tell you that all the one’s that get A’s are hiding away in their basements, studying themselves; and the material. So instead, you get stuck with studying with hollywood wanna-be’s and straight-C students. Like this one time, I decided to do a study group for an exam with some Asian kids. The professor recommended doing the study guide before the exam day, but procrastination recommended I do it tomorrow to keep the material “fresh.” In the middle of studying, one of my Middle-eastern friends decided to put on her headphones and listen to music (In case you were wondering, Middle-Eastern is also Asian, like Russians are Asian…you racist). The music was so loud, we could hear it through her headphones, and she even sang along with the lyrics! People looked at us in the study center with huge open eyes. I couldn’t tell if she was just bad at singing, or if it was just the foreign lyrics. We kept telling her to shut up her miserable American Idol audition, but she refused by calling us racists. I did not understand how telling her to shut up her ethnic singing in a quiet area is a suppression of her culture.

We all felt hopeless about this exam, and mentally checked out long ago. My friend decided that the best time to learn about her people would be…now. She proceeded to take out her smart-phone, and started teaching us random facts about her people. I was annoyed at her until she read me a fact that stated her ethnic group is almost extinct.

Did Darwinism take over because her ancestors pissed off the neighbors by singing cultural songs all day? I’m sorry you just realized that you don’t have a bubble on the National Census sheet, but we have an EXAM in an hour. I don’t care if I pass with a C, but afterwards I have to go work on my screenplays to submit to Hollywood!